Sung to the tune of "It's the End of the World as we Know It" by R.E.M.

That's great it starts with a dwarf quest,
Orcs and Wargs, a riddle game.
A Hobbit thief is not afraid.
Eye of an Overlord.
listen to an Elf warn
Gandalf sees the One Ring,
Hobbit has the One Ring.
Read it off in Orc-speak, grunt,
low squeek, Council starts to chatter
as fear fights down light.
"Throw it in the fire
like the seven Dwarven rings,"
before Mindolluin expires
at the combat site.
Left of East and coming in a hurry
with the nazgul breathing down your neck.
Team by team reporting scouts are stumped,
weathered, stopped.
Look at that low flame! Fine, then. Oh well
Rivendell, big decision, pack some food,
nine'll do. South you go, off you go.
Thwarted by Caradhras
Balrog is a bad ass.
Gandalf with a staff-blow and
a warning and a bright light.
The panic-stricken wound-lickin'
men led then in to Loth-Lorien

It's the end of an age as we know it.
It's the end of an age as we know it.
It's the end of an age as we know it
and I feel fine. Company discussion hour.
Don't get caught by searching tower.
Slash and din. Anduin.
Boromir's temptation wins.
Looking in, battle forming, Orc killing,
blood letting. Frodo, Sam evacuate.
Other Hobbits Orcs take.
Strider, Gimli, and Legolas
hunt down, hunt down.
Riders' horses crush, crush,
uh-oh this means no fear,
Treebeard, White Rider reappears!
A Saruman, a Saruman, a Saruman of lies.
Offer him solutions offer him alternatives
and he declines.

It's the end of an age as we know it.
It's the end of an age as we know it.
It's the end of an age as we know it
and I feel fine.

The final day the King arrives,
Theoden of Rohan dies.
Eowyn's and Merry's war,
Witch King of Angmar.
Imrahil of Amroth, Hirluin and Forlong.
Then in Morder, Sam and Frodo
reach Mount Doom.
Your parasitic, ring-neurotic,
slam dunk death, right? Right.

It's the end of an age as we know it.
It's the end of an age as we know it.
It's the end of an age as we know it
and I feel

(It's time I scour the Shire at home)